I Will Be A Great Mom One Day (As Long As Someone Else Has My Babies)

I find it demeaning when people say that all women should want to have babies.  You know, that women ought to perform their biological duty and focus on breeding.  But not all women have an innate maternal instinct to become a mother.  And some would rather have kids the new-fashioned way: sticking their embryos into a lovely surrogate mother, and saving themselves the inevitable mama trauma.

To me, having a child is like getting a gift in January, and then being told that you have to wait until September to open it.  Not only do you have to wait an unbearably long time (I want to open it NOW!), but you have to endure something that you’ve tried to avoid your entire womanly life: you get fat. You get cankles.  And you get stretch marks so bad that you could practice calligraphy on the lines along your waist.

After being forced to learn about ”The Miracle of Birth” in high school, I am traumatized by the entire process.  And honestly, I don’t understand how anyone can call birth a “miracle”.  How can you call something a miracle when it’s happened more than 6 billion times?  If this is the case, then you could call yawning a miracle.  And come on — you can’t control miracles.  I couldn’t pop a pill and stop the U.S. from beating the Russians in 1980.  A true “miracle” birth would be if I were on the pill, got knocked up, attempted an abortion, and still gave birth to a 100% Caucasian baby with the bone structure of a centaur.

Since I am Asian and not fond of horses, that would truly be a miracle.

Advertisement

1 Comment

Filed under Uncategorized

One Response to I Will Be A Great Mom One Day (As Long As Someone Else Has My Babies)

  1. i love your blog always read it but do you think u can post more on health

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

Gravatar
WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s