Category Archives: Arts and Entertainment
This Hard Knock Life
Growing up, I had two life goals. The first was to own a half-dog, half-monkey that I would call a “donkey” (pronounced “dunky”). The second was to become a Grammy-winning, multiplatinum rap star. Needless to say, I have failed on … Continue reading
Filed under Arts and Entertainment, Random
Why Women Hate Sports
All women hate sports. OK, this is not entirely true. “All” women do not hate sports, just as “all” men do not love sports, just as “All That” was not all that “all that” (in fact, it was mediocre programming at … Continue reading
Filed under Arts and Entertainment
Kim Jong-Il is Coming to Town
It’s that time of the year again, when the big-bellied man up North holds center stage. He’s rounding up his minions, firing up his sled, and getting ready to dole out holiday gifts with gusto. What will he bring us … Continue reading
Filed under Arts and Entertainment, News
Bring Her Back
The big news in the entertainment world this week has been all about American Idol — who will be the judges for next season? Simon’s out, Ellen’s out, J.Lo’s out, but Steven Tyler is (reportedly) in the mix. Yawn. Well, … Continue reading
Filed under Arts and Entertainment
Coming Out of The Dark Ages
Growing up, I was surrounded by a lowbrow smorgasbord of R.L. Stine, Salute Your Shorts, and Mortal Kombat. Instead of reading Chaucer, I double-fisted Goosebumps and the Babysitter’s Club. I Chose My Own Adventure and got diphtheria on the Oregon … Continue reading
Filed under Arts and Entertainment, Life
What Would Ryan Seacrest Do?
Remember when Jesus died on Good Friday, rose again on Easter Sunday, and then somberly looked into our eyes and said, “I’ll be back?”* Jesus has proved to be a man of his word, rising from the dead to hobnob … Continue reading
Filed under Arts and Entertainment, News
Better Than the Jersey Shore
Over the past few months, Jersey Shore has served as the tacit Bible for those who wish to follow the path of DJ Jesus: a life of immodest tanning, unattractive hair styling, and exuberant fist pumping interspersed with punches in … Continue reading
Filed under Arts and Entertainment
As the Peacock Turns
Hey, Jeff Zucker. Congratulations on pulling a Jason Mesnick from The Bachelor (for the highbrows, this is a John Kerry 2004 reference). Yes, over at NBC, they’re spreading a flippity-floppity flu. One day they like Jay… the next day, they like Conan. Oh wait, back to … Continue reading
Filed under Arts and Entertainment, News
Old Tiger May Have Been “Boring,” But At Least He Doesn’t Have The Clap
Dammit, Tiger Woods. Forget about your wife for a second (I’m guessing that won’t be hard) — How could you do this to us, your fans? Just last week, every person in America was a fan of Tiger Woods. You … Continue reading
Filed under Arts and Entertainment
